Wild in Here

"Let Daddy put your monkeys on."

---Me

Ewwwww.

"Don't rub boogers in your eyes!!"

---Me

From Her Mouth To...

"Don't brush your hair with your toothbrush!  Don't brush daddy's hair with your toothbrush!" 

---April

Done With Dinner

"You don't poke your ham with my keys!!"

---Me

First Time At A Real Cemetery

"Get off the dead people!!!"

---Theresa

Gross, But Cute

Months ago my best friend Kerr sent my daughter a package in the mail.  We opened it to find Pee & Poo.  No other items in our home have inspired such ridiculous comments.  Here are just a few I've found myself saying lately:
"Did you want to bring Pee & Poop with us to the laundry room?"
"Don't chew on Poop!"
and my personal favorite:
"Look I made Poop a girl!" 
I really did.  You can see:

Overheard By A Husband Who Laughed Until He Cried

"Don't talk with your penis!"

---Anonymous Mom